Savannah

So this is hard for me to write about in any way that does it justice. First of all, I'm so behind on blogging, I actually got a little excited and posted here a quick preview of our spring break trip to Savannah. I just had to capture the way our families have grown. It amazes me. Because I feel like Ashley and I were just 16 years old, running around South Roanoke in our knock-around skirts and tie-dyes. In any case, every time I see Ashley, I am in shock. And here's why. We were best friends very suddenly - we were well into our sophomore year in high school, and had never given each other much thought. And the best way I can describe it is this . . . she rescued me from myself. Which she still does over and over again. I have all sorts of hang-ups with control and perfectionism and defensiveness and being unable to handle criticism. I'm sure none of you know this, of course (and Tim will assure you Ashley by no means cured me of said attributes). Well, Ashley decided that was a bunch of crap and that we were going to be friends, and that she was going to crack the veneer and show me how to live life properly. And messily. Both literally and figuratively (I did, occasionally, break down and clean our shared beach house room, or spray her kitchen counters down after we'd left fingerprints on the gorgeous blue tile - sometimes I can't help myself). But she's loosened me up A LOT. So we became best friends very fast, and we were inseparable, and then we went to our respective colleges. And this leads me to why I'm in shock every time I see Ashley. And why I love her with an intensity I usually reserve for my children and husband. No matter how long it's been since we've seen each other, we just pick back up. Within an hour of our arrival in Savannah, Chase commented on how we say the same thing at the same time a lot. Okay, not that unusual I know. But it's remarkable - and speaks to the true value of real friendship - that even though Ashley and I went in very different directions (she to the art world, me to the world of corporate law), even though she's calm and sweet and emotional, and I'm significantly less so, even though she's a free range mom and I'm a helicopter parent, even though we now go YEARS without seeing each other, there is NEVER an awkward moment. And here's the REALLY crazy part. Our kids love each other. Our kids, who are all so different from each other, and see each other roughly every 3 years or so, immediately run off together and play and bond and don't exchange a single word of conflict. Come on! That's unheard of! There are just so many funny and important places Ashley has been in my life. Right there when my parents were splitting up and I was pretending Everything Is Awesome! Or the brief period of time when we both lived in New York, and I had fallen in love with a man who was pretty much anaphylactically allergic to my cat, so she let me move that horrid, hateful cat into her tiny Brooklyn studio apartment. Or most recently, as we've both struggled with our evolving, messy, magnificent lives, just being there to chat with. And dammit, she got me addicted to Mexican Mochas in the process. So, Ashley, thank you again for a visit that was too short. And incredibly healing. You're the closest thing to a sister I'll ever have. I pray every day that Caroline finds someone like you.